Hurdles and Huddles

When I scrapped the old blog I also mentioned WWIII in my home. That battle had to do with a... shall we say... relapse in the faulty judgement related skills of The Daughter, this time where school was concerned. After her first nine week report came out, The Daughter decided it was time to exercise her right to skip classes... A LOT. After several weeks of missing 7th period, her teacher called and alerted me to the problem. Once I got all the information from the teacher, I called the dean of discipline and the guidance counselor and found out that she'd been skipping several classes, and was rarely turning in her homework. THIS from a kid who is the top one percentile of the nation in standardized testing!

I took care of matters on the homefront immediately. She is severely restricted from any social activities, including Internet and phone priveledges. With her freedoms squashed, I set about trying to help her put together a plan to get her shit together before the final grading period.

The good: The Daughter admitted to me a week later that she was relieved to have finally gotten caught. She had skipped so much that she was scared to go back to class. When she was busted and the jig was up, she had no choice but to fall in line. I was relieved to hear that from her.

The bad: Her grades definitely suffered. Though she wasn't failing any classes, she got two "Ds" on her report card (this from a consistently straight A student)

So today I had my appointment with all of her teachers and her guidance counselor. More good: Since being busted, she's really stepped it up. She's participating in lectures, answering questiongs, and doing remarkable work. More good: They all adore her. They described her as bright, electric, creative, a natural leader, a drama queen, random, charismatic, capable, delightful. The bad: They all agree that she is not working to her potential, and she's far too interested in socializing. The good: The damage can be undone. All her teachers are willing to give her at least partial credit on the assignments that she didn't turn in, and all are willing to work with me on a daily basis to make sure that she doesn't slip one centimeter unnoticed.

Two of her teachers stayed for an extra 30 minutes to tell me stories about The Daughter. And I have to say that these two teachers really get her. They see what I see, good and bad, and they have an abundance of faith in her while still seeing the dangers that might be just around the corner if she continues this path. It's sort of like having two more parents to help me help her.

As I said, I realize that parenting is a day by day job. There are no hurdles that are jumped once and for all. You jump each hurdle, catch your breath, and then gear up to jump the next. In between the hurdles you will laugh a lot. Then you will cry after the next jump. And I think it stays this way until that child decides for herself how she will channel her energy towards success.

Parenting is just running, jumping, and resting. Maybe seeing that will make life a little bit easier in the end.