The Closet
I'm sorry Prada.
I never meant to hurt you.
I never meant to hurt you.
I never meant to make you cry,
But tonight, I'm cleaning out my closet.
Remember how I said my desk was WAY messy? Well, I today I did something about it.
I cleaned out my closet.
Now, hear me out. If I'm cleaning out my closet (which is in my bedroom) then I am NOT looking at my desk (which is in the office off the garage). Ipso facto, I have done something about it.
I can't believe the years' worth of crap that has fallen into the bottom of my closet. I enlisted The Husband and got him to go through his half (okay, make that eighth) of our shared closet. As of tonight, it's totally organized and full of clothes that we'll actually wear. The local charity is getting a trunk full of stuff I never knew I didn't need.
Sorry Prada... I never meant to buy you and then lose too much weight to wear you. But in my defense, I bought you at a designer consignment shop and didn't pay all that much for you anyhow. Plus, you're used to being discarded. Imagine the smiles on the faces of the clerks if they realize what you're worth. Imagine the glow on the face of someone who actually picks you up for 4.95! It's not that I don't love or appreciate you... it's just that I never intend to be that size again.
I also found loads of papers that I had to spend time perusing. I found the earliest of love notes between The Husband and I. So sweet and new it was! I found school papers from the kids' elementary days. I found medical records from The Daughter's time at the childrens' hospital. "Diagnosis: Possibly Tourette's Syndrome.... may present in puberty or may continue to display periodic tics... have discussed symptoms with mother, including...OCD... demanding/aggressive personality..." I had completely forgotten that time in our lives, me and The Daughter. Maybe I didn't want to remember. But it's pretty undeniable that while she isn't displaying tics right now, she may be dealing with other symptoms of the disorder. Remind me to cut her a break the next time I want to break her neck.
I cleaned out my closet.
Now, hear me out. If I'm cleaning out my closet (which is in my bedroom) then I am NOT looking at my desk (which is in the office off the garage). Ipso facto, I have done something about it.
I can't believe the years' worth of crap that has fallen into the bottom of my closet. I enlisted The Husband and got him to go through his half (okay, make that eighth) of our shared closet. As of tonight, it's totally organized and full of clothes that we'll actually wear. The local charity is getting a trunk full of stuff I never knew I didn't need.
Sorry Prada... I never meant to buy you and then lose too much weight to wear you. But in my defense, I bought you at a designer consignment shop and didn't pay all that much for you anyhow. Plus, you're used to being discarded. Imagine the smiles on the faces of the clerks if they realize what you're worth. Imagine the glow on the face of someone who actually picks you up for 4.95! It's not that I don't love or appreciate you... it's just that I never intend to be that size again.
I also found loads of papers that I had to spend time perusing. I found the earliest of love notes between The Husband and I. So sweet and new it was! I found school papers from the kids' elementary days. I found medical records from The Daughter's time at the childrens' hospital. "Diagnosis: Possibly Tourette's Syndrome.... may present in puberty or may continue to display periodic tics... have discussed symptoms with mother, including...OCD... demanding/aggressive personality..." I had completely forgotten that time in our lives, me and The Daughter. Maybe I didn't want to remember. But it's pretty undeniable that while she isn't displaying tics right now, she may be dealing with other symptoms of the disorder. Remind me to cut her a break the next time I want to break her neck.
posted by Robin at 10:10 PM
6 Comments:
Wow, my gosh, I had no clue about your daughter.
Ok. The Prada. Can you get it tailored? Or is it beyond help? Well, that's ok, I guess. One person's discards is another person's treasures.
Spring must have come early ~ I'm doing the same thing around here.
M~
What is this Prada of which you speak?
Wow, Tourettes, really? That's rough. I hope they're wrong.
Good to clean out the closets.
Old Prada in your closet. Oh there's a joke in there somewhere.
~S
I know what hubby's got, 'cause I've got it too. No, we didn't get it there...!
It's a small kidney stone, scratching away at the inner wall of the kidney. The insurance mafia found mine and promptly decided that when it breaks loose they are off the hook: pre-existing conditions, you know...
I always thought it was the husband that had Tourrette's, what with all the f-words. Is that stuff hereditary?
P.S. Clay Aiken's new CD of covers is out. :)
~S
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